Before we get deep into this topic, I would like to address a certain situation that would be the primary example of not avoiding it.
Take issuing marriage licenses, or example:
A Christian woman, who was a county clerk; was voted in to take lead in issuing marriage licenses. Just recently, gay marriage was made legal. When the situation finally arose, a gay couple came in requesting a marriage license. Kim refused to issue it to them due to her convictions against it. She also refused to let any of her associates issue it for her. Here is where the problem lies. Of course, that does not undermine God's definition of marriage, as it is between one man and one woman. But not everyone is going to agree with that view, nor do we have the right, as Christians; to impose our convictions on others who don't have them.
As a result, what happens? She is arrested for contempt of court and put in prison, and publicly shamed. Yikes! That sounds like some unnecessary junk to me!
I know with all this talk about the Kim Davis situation, there is alot of debate, argument, and different opinions on the subject matter. But here is the die hard truth: it could have been avoided, and by a long shot.
How could have Kim avoided this situation? She chose not to find another job knowing that this conflict would arise regarding her job. To the many I see falling for her antics to support a "persecuted Christian": Yes it is true, the position that she holds, as an elected official; (by law) requires her to sign that marriage license whether she supports gay marriage or not. In any other job position where you serve, your personal beliefs can only dictate whether or not you take the job. And when your beliefs and your job conflict, what do you do? The choice is yours. Do you serve God, or money? A true Christian response, in this case for Kim Davis; that instead of arguing with them over her values and beliefs is to resign. Christ's kingdom is not political. It never has been. The kingdom is in the heart. Take a stand Kim, and resign.
What could have been avoided: Jail time, the inability to be hired in the future, and public shame.
Kim's situation is just one of the many situations that have unnecessary junk in them. How many times, as individuals; have we allowed problems into our lives that didn't have to be there. Let's take a look at the big picture.
Some junk in our lives may be needed, and even good for us to learn from and make use of, but some junk in our lives should be avoided at all costs. There may be dire situations that cannot be avoided, such as life. But if you possess the collective wisdom needed, you can skew your way around unwanted problems in your daily life. Beats stepping into a pile of you know what, or a trap sat out right in front of you.
Use Wisdom In Your Daily Battles
You are absolutely infuriated about your situation. You finally want to climb your way out of the mudd pin. But before you take action, look before you leap. If you decide to fight it, you better consider the consequences first. It may take some strength to keep your cool when someone does you wrong, but think about it. What good will it do to vent to the person who did you dirty? Will it make matters better? Sometimes the best thing to do with conflicts is to hold your tongue. Speak your mind when you are angry, you'll make the greatest speech you will ever regret.Does this mean you should sacrifice your values and convictions? Not in the least. You should always stand up for what you believe in, even if you stand alone. But some things we spend our time arguing with other people about may not be those things we think are important to us. So in these cases, walking away probably might be more to your best interest than theirs. Let them think they've won. The sooner you can move on, the sooner you can get back to the things that are important to you.
Stay Away From People Who Give You Crap.
As Robin Williams quoted "I used to think that the worse thing in life is to be alone. It's not. The worse thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel alone."This rings true, and when you are around crap happy people who constantly have something bad spewing out of them every-time you turn around, you might want to avoid those people. No matter if it is a "friend" who always talking trash about your other friends, a co-worker who tries to set you up for failure, a relative who constantly puts you down, or maybe a teacher who regularly makes you feel so stupid you want to disappear. The more you spend time with these kind of people, the more you are going to run into problems you don't want.
Escaping from problem happy bosses, coworkers, or teachers may be a little more difficult. Just do what you can to accomodate their expectations so you can move on to something else.
See avoiding unnecessary problems part 2